Wednesday 6 July 2016

Your Mid-Week Update for 07/06/16

I’m doing it. There’s no stopping now. This month is officially dedicated to experimentation and creativity; and alleviating my “empty nest” rut.

It’s not really a rut. I’m still killing. There’s been no decrease in activity but after last week’s fun little detour in methodology, I’ve decided my new project is to broaden my horizons by forcing myself out of my box.

Every week this month, I’m going to choose a room in my house and I’m going to kill using commonly found objects in that room. You may think this is just a gimmick but I think that the summer is about doing what you love and growing – even as an adult. After over twenty years of this, it never hurts to try something new. I’ve started off with an easy one.

Week one: Kitchen.

Now knives have to be omitted, obviously, but also cookware. It’s too easy to just bludgeon to death the next random stranger I see. This has to require some thought. My first idea was a kettle. Boil some water, splash it on their skin then beat them with it. What I discovered is that I killed the young woman too quickly after the water hit her skin so it hadn’t started to burn or tear. She just had a red-ish tint to her face at time of death. Underwhelming but ultimately successful.

My most recent weapon was a whisk. I was actually kind of hesitant to use this tool because I just could not think of anything.  But for whatever reason, it was the first thing I saw when I left yesterday morning so I vowed to do it.

I really could not tell you what possessed me to choose a whisk other than to torturously challenge myself.

That would actually explain a lot of my choices lately.

Another lovely young woman crossed my path and ultimately, I shoved the weapon down her throat. The utensil blocked her airway and as she struggled, I could see the whisk expanding at the base of her neck until she tore through some of the muscle and ultimately suffocated.

I can honestly say that’s a first.

The thing I’m enjoying most about these experiments is that I’m getting a lot of firsts out of it. After all this time, it’s nice to have a few more firsts under my belt. My next kill won’t be until Friday but I’m trying not to plan ahead too much. Spontaneity can be a blessing or a curse in my line of work. Overthinking things never helps but being cautious is why I’ve lasted as long as I have.

It’s all about balance.

If you have any suggestions for rooms or household items you’d like me to try, please pass them on. Let’s make this a group effort.

As always, dear readers,

Stay Safe

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